As I write in my book The Long Hot Marriage, there are many keys to creating one.  Introducing novelty into the relationship is one of the many keys to doing that.  I am following up my Tuesday article with 5 ways I introduce novelty into my relationship.  Notice that adding novelty is not only about sex but also for sure adding novelty in your sex life is very important as well.  Novelty keeps things stimulating and fresh for the relationship and it also keeps you on your own healthy growing edge.  It even builds new neuronal connections in your brain!

Here are 5 (of the many) ways I introduce novelty into the relationship:

1) I bring up topics with my wife that we never discussed before.

2) I take dance lessons with my wife that is always novel since there are always new dances and new dance steps. (Dance is also a great way of non-verbal connecting and with dance, you never communicate exactly the same way twice).

3) We take each other to new places both locally and far away.

4) We allow each other to be playful and creative in the bedroom via role-playing so that other parts of us can come out and be expressed.

5) We broaden our definition of what sex means and specifically what good sex means so that the process becomes flexible and varied.

What are the ways that you introduce novelty into your relationship?  What are ways you can introduce novelty but have not tried yet?  Your relationship is an adventure.  Treat it that way and you will see the energy rise in you and in your relationship!