Relationships can be challenging and painful at times and this month I have been writing about the serious topic of infidelity. So for the 5th Thursday in March, how about a little humor!
“Someone told me the delightful story of the crusader who put a chastity belt on his wife and gave the key to his best friend for safekeeping, in case of his death. He had ridden only a few miles away when his friend, riding hard, caught up with him, saying ‘You gave me the wrong key!”
Why We Split Up
She told me we couldn’t afford beer anymore and I’d have to quit. Then I caught her spending $65 on makeup. So I asked, how come I had to give up stuff and not her.
She said she needed the makeup to look pretty for me.
I told her that was what the beer was for.
I don’t think she’s coming back.
(Taken from guy-sports.com)
Backseat Driver Joke
A wife was sitting peacefully in her cozy armchair sewing her husband’s socks. Her husband came into the room and glanced at what she was doing, and started badgering,
“HONEY be more careful! PLEASE WATCH WHAT YOU ARE DOING! You don’t want to poke YOUR finger! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU! Don’t look up when YOU’RE SEWING! There you go now slow and steady, nice even stitches.
The wife puts down the needle and thread, looks up at her husband, and says,
“What the hell is wrong with you? Do you know how many times I’ve sewn socks before?!
“EXACTLY THE POINT I WAS TRYING TO GET AT”, hollered the husband, “DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I’VE DRIVEN A CAR BEFORE!?
(Taken from greatcleanjokes.com)
Hope you enjoyed these. Next month I will be talking about toxic relationships- how to heal in them and from them.