Creating a Passionate Marriage

Creating a Passionate Marriage

By | Communication, Intimacy, Long Hot Marriage, Sexual Dysfunction | No Comments

I love writing about this stuff! I just celebrated with my wife our 33rd wedding anniversary this past Saturday and I enjoy the creative process of keeping things alive and fresh in my own marriage.   Yes, passionate marriages are created; created by paying attention to each other, courageously communicating and doing new things and also keeping yourself interesting.   The only way to keep yourself interesting is to lean beyond your edge.   Your edge (as David Deida says…

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The Five Biggest Blocks to Intimacy

The Five Biggest Blocks to Intimacy

By | Communication, Intimacy, Passion, Sex, Sexual Dysfunction, Sexy Marriage | No Comments

Intimacy is about feeling close to your partner.  It is about feeling safe enough to be vulnerable.  It is about having an interpersonal adventure by trying new things together in and out of the bedroom.   In this article, I write about the five main obstacles that prevent many couples from enjoying the deep pleasure of depth and feeling genuinely bonded.   If you have one or more of these obstacles happening in your relationship, just remember that I assist…

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The Courage & Safety of Intimacy

By | Healthy Marriage, Intimacy, Love advice, Marital Advice, Relationships, Romance, Sensuality, Sex, Successful Marriages | No Comments

Are you letting fear ruin the possibility of having intimate love? In this video, marriage and sex therapist Todd Creager discusses the courage and safety of intimacy, and learning to give and receive love. He'll show you the 2 critical steps that you need to take in order to create the right environment in your relationship where you can relax and be truly intimate with your partner. "Intimacy is the practice of courage." -Todd Creager I encourage you to be...

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3 Words More Important than I Love You

3 Words More Important than I Love You

By | Communication, Intimacy, Marriage, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems | 2 Comments

“I love you.”  What could be better than that?  Saying a heartfelt “I love you,” to your intimate partner can bring you both closer and evoke feelings such as warmth and compassion.  However, many people say those three words, and many relationships are still in a heap of trouble.  I have three words for you that if practiced regularly and genuinely will truly transform your relationship and may just be the most direct route to a loving relationship. Communication is…

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How to communicate your way to a stellar relationship

How to communicate your way to a STELLAR relationship

By | Communication, Healthy Marriage, Intimacy, Listening Skills | No Comments

Healthy communication is the #1 most important thing you must have in your relationship Fortunately, it's something that can be easily learned and applied to your relationship. Here are my top 3 tips that will help you to communicate your way to a stellar relationship or marriage, and increase your connection and understanding of your partner. Here's what I cover in this video Tip#1:  Drop Your Agenda Why its good for both your relationship and your health... Tip #2:  Feel...

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5 Signs that a Betrayed Person can Trust the Partner Again

5 Signs that a Betrayed Person can Trust the Partner Again

By | Cheating, Commitment, Communication, Infidelity, Intimacy, Marital Problems, Marriage, Toxic Relationships | No Comments

Your partner cheated on you.  You discovered the affair.  You both have been working on the relationship and trying to heal.  However, you have been hurt in one of the most painful ways possible and it is difficult to let your guard down.  “What if he or she does it again?  Then I will REALLY feel like a fool!”   It makes sense to hold back trust.  It makes sense to be protective.  However, if that continues for a long time,…

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Alternatives to Infidelity - Healthy Ways to Regulate Your Emotions

Alternatives to Infidelity – Healthy Ways to Regulate Your Emotions

By | Commitment, Communication, Infidelity, Intimacy, Relationships | No Comments

In my last blog, I talked about another way to think about infidelity- Infidelity is a way to regulate our emotions.  Down regulating consists of managing hyperarousal, stress and anxiety. Up-regulating consists of arousing or enlivening ourselves when we feel bored or empty.  I would recommend reading that article before continuing to read this one if you have not read it already.  I am not saying that if you do what I write below- infidelity issues will cease; it is…

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Why People Cheat- Another Look at Infidelity

Why People Cheat- Another Look at Infidelity

By | Commitment, Communication, Family Relationships, Infidelity, Intimacy, Long Hot Marriage | No Comments

As a professor and psychotherapist, I have learned some things about early childhood development.  Infants and young children do not have the brain apparatus to regulate their emotions so they utilize their caretaker’s brains basically to do the regulation.  For example, the attuned mother can calm an anxious baby with touch or food or changing a wet diaper.  This is called down-regulation meaning that the mother in these examples helps the child go from a more stressed, inflamed state to…

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Why infidelity is a lonely place to be

By | Infidelity, Intimacy | No Comments

In this video I share why infidelity is a lonely place to be.  You'll find out why loneliness causes infidelity and a disconnection with your partner. We live in a very image conscious society so many of us often hold back parts of ourselves because we're afraid to share our authentic self It's a double edge sword...you feel like you can't share all sides of yourself so you disconnect from your relationship.  You commit infidelity and you end up feeling...

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How to put a stop to anxiety over your performance

Men: How to put a stop to anxiety over your performance

By | Great Sex, Intimacy, Sex | No Comments

In this video Todd talks about how put a stop to anxiety over your performance in bed. You'll want to watch this video whether you are a man or a woman as Todd dispels common beliefs around intimacy and male performance. He shares what women really want from their partner based upon his 30+ years in private practice working with couples. In this video Todd talks about how put a stop to anxiety over your performance in bed. You'll want to watch this video whether you...

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