How To Stop Your Family From Pulling Your Chains

By | Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships, Holidays | No Comments

How to not let family members or anyone for that matter pull your chains Your family doesn’t have to yank your chains during the holidays or anytime you get together for that matter.   Watch this short video where Todd shows you how to keep those happy feelings even when someone says something that pushes your buttons. Here’s to keeping your family celebrations happy!    

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Healing from sexual trauma

Healing from Sexual Trauma

By | Counseling, Dysfunctional Family, EMDR, Healing, Healing from Sexual Trauma, Rape, Sexual abuse, Sexual Desire, Sexual Trauma, Trauma | No Comments

Many clients come to see me because of symptoms due to either molest, rape or other sexual trauma.  Two weeks ago, I talked about types of sexual trauma and last week I talked about how sexual trauma can affect sexuality.  This article, though brief will succinctly describe some of the things I do and recommend to help people heal from sexual trauma.  Here are 7 keys to healing from sexual trauma: 1)   Relationships are very important.  Having loved ones, or…

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How to overcome your dysfunctional family

By | Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships | No Comments

Think you might have a dysfunctional family or wondering how to overcome yours? In this video Todd shares how to recognize if your family is dysfunctional.  And he shares some insightful tips that will help you change your self sabotaging behaviors. So grab a piece of paper, watch this short video, jot down a few notes then practice what Todd tells you to do and free yourself from your dysfunctional family. Not 100% sure you have a dysfunctional family? I…

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Create a New Positive Family Legacy

By | Communication, Counseling, Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships, Holidays, Marital Advice, Marital Problems, Marriage, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems, Mind/Body Health, Parenting, Relationships, Toxic Relationships, Videos | No Comments

Family! Ever find your parents’ voice coming out of your mouth? Do you find yourself recreating the same patterns with your partner or children? Are you longing to have a different relationship with your family?  Sometimes, it seems that nothing will ever change. But, you have the ability to change EVERYTHING. By making a few adjustments in how YOU deal with your past, you will liberate your family to a new way of being! Watch this video for a quick, powerful list of 5…

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How to make the Holidays Happy: Putting Inner Peace Even Above Tradition

How to make the Holidays Happy: Putting Inner Peace Even Above Tradition

By | Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships, Holidays, Love, Love advice, Marital Advice, Marriage Advice, Relationships | No Comments

Here’s a radical notion.  How about you feeling a great sense of well being during the holidays?  No stress, no rushing, no hurrying.  Is that even possible? Let’s look at our priorities, which we can only tell by our behavior.  For example, if in past holiday seasons you have spent more money than you had or were running around like a chicken without its head in the last few days before Christmas or Hanukkah, you made buying gifts or “being…

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Healing from Trauma: Getting Past Your Past

By | Divorce, Dysfunctional Family, Healing, Marriage Problems, Parenting, Videos | No Comments

Relationships struggle from time to time; it happens. However, if you or a loved one consistently are impeded in your emotional well-being, you might be suffering from trauma. It can be trauma from your childhood, more recent, or even from your relationship itself. No matter how difficult, healing can happen. Check out the latest technique I’ve been learning about that helps quickly erase the effects of living the pain over and over again, and helps you get back to the…

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Toxic Relationship: Couple Quarreling

Verbal Abuse Can Be Subtle and Traumatic

By | Coping, Counseling, Dysfunctional Family, Healing, Relationships, Toxic Relationships | 8 Comments

This article will be written as if the males are the abusers and the females are the victims, which is true according to research the majority of the time.  However, if you are a male that is the victim or a female who is the perpetrator, please just swap the pronouns in your head. It is easy to understand that sexual and physical abuse can be traumatic.   It is also easy to understand that severe verbal abuse (i.e.-yelling, name calling)…

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How Cheating Cheats the Cheater

By | Communication, Dysfunctional Family, Infidelity, Intimacy, Long Hot Marriage, Love, Love advice, Marital Advice, Marital Problems, Marriage, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems, Parenting, Relationships | One Comment

When infidelity happens, we think if it as the person who had the affair cheated ON his or her partner. And of course that is true! However, I can show you how the cheater cheats him or herself. But firstly, ask yourself if you know someone who cheated who did not make his or her life worse on some level. Or maybe you might have cheated in the past- did you lose out on that choice you made. I would…

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Communication in Relationships: Effective and Destructive

By | Communication, Conflict Resolution, Coping, Counseling, Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships, Healing, Intimacy, Love, Love advice, Marriage, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems, Parenting, Relationships, Successful Marriages, Toxic Relationships | No Comments

Effective: Clean communication- clean communication is when the only intent of your communication is to reveal something about yourself. Example: I am angry with you for getting defensive rather than listening. Destructive: Unclean communication- unclean communication is when you have other intentions such as punishing the other person defending yourself, getting rid of your own tension or proving you are right. Example: Yelling loudly- your listening skills suck!  (Getting rid of tension) Effective: Being receptive which includes dropping your own…

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Toxic Relationship: Couple Quarreling

“You’re the Worst Communicator Ever”- Confessions of a Marriage Therapist- (Me)

By | Communication, Conflict Resolution, Coping, Counseling, Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships, Healing, Intimacy, Love, Love advice, Marriage, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems, Parenting, Relationships, Toxic Relationships | No Comments

I have been to many parties where people would come up to my wife and say- “You must have a perfect marriage- you are married to a marriage therapist.”  And my wife found that comment very funny!  The truth is- yes- I am a marriage therapist, and I am also a human being who grew up in a family where great communication was not modeled.  There were many times I would be helping a couple with communication and suddenly had…

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