How to Increase Orgasmic Potential in Women

How to Increase Orgasmic Potential in Women

By | Arousal, Communication, EMDR, Female orgasmic disorder, Intimacy, Marital Advice, Sexual Desire, Sexual Dysfunction, Sexual Trauma | No Comments

Orgasms are wonderful to experience and I will be writing about ways to maximize the chances of having one (or multiple).  But first- let’s be clear.  Putting too much emphasis on the end result of most things takes away the pleasure of the process.  This is exponentially true when it comes to enjoying our sexual selves.  And the truth is for some people; they cannot experience orgasm no matter what they do.  So, if you are one of those people,…

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Orgasmic Issues in Women

Orgasmic Issues in Women

By | Arousal, Communication, Eroticism, Female orgasmic disorder, Intimacy, Passion, Sex, Sexual Dysfunction | No Comments

I have worked with many women and couples where the female is having trouble experiencing orgasms.   There are a lot of myths and false information.  As you will see below, physiological, emotional, and relational factors can all contribute to the problem.  However, as we are discovering in many aspects of sexuality, there is no real “normal,” and woman and their partners need to be careful not to be critical of the woman having orgasmic difficulties. Here are ten facts about Female…

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There’s Nothing Stressful Out There

There’s Nothing Stressful Out There!

By | Communication, Compassion, Harmony, Mindfulness, Peace, Spirituality | 2 Comments

It’s All About Perception Traffic, financial challenges, health fears, obstinate children, meddling in-laws- stressful right? WRONG! There is nothing inherently stressful about any of those challenges.  Yes, it is true these kinds of issues can automatically lead to a fight or flight reaction because on some level, it feels like a threat. However, there is good news here. There is a way to think about every one of those problems in a way that can significantly reduce the stress you…

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De-stress NOW and Enjoy the Holidays

De-stress NOW and Enjoy the Holidays

By | Communication, Harmony, Holidays, Marital Advice, Marital Problems, Meditation, Peace, Spirituality | No Comments

Another client just called me and asked if I could forgive her if she canceled late and not be charged. (I have a 48-hour cancellation policy).  She is plowed under with a lot of Christmas cards to get out.  I felt like being generous so I let her off the hook.  She released a sigh of relief.   This is a common scenario and many of you reading this can relate.  My wife and I went to REI because I…

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Meditation, Marriage and other miscellaneous matters

Meditation, Marriage and other Miscellaneous Matters

By | Communication, Harmony, Healthy Marriage, Marriage, Meditation | No Comments

The Benefits of Developing a meditation practice Wednesday night is my Yoga/Meditation class night.  Wednesday nights I notice how I handle interpersonal issues with my wife so much more lovingly.  I handle my emotions more effectively and it takes so much more to get me stressed.   I remember a few classes where I was angry with my wife over some matter in the beginning of class and I saw her and our situation totally differently at the end of class….

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Importance of Playfulness in Your Relationships

By | Commitment, Communication, Creating More Passion in Marriage, Great Sex, Intimacy, Long Hot Marriage, Love, Marital Advice, Marriage Advice, Passion, Relationships, Romance, Sex, Sexy Marriage | No Comments

I want to talk to you about the importance of being playful in your intimate relationships Remember back when you began your courtship?  I’ll bet you were more playful, romantic and maybe a bit silly…am I right? Then you became committed and maybe got married, bought a house and/or had kids…right? At some point you became functional and lost the element of surprise and delight in your relationship. We all need to get back the playfulness in our relationships.  In…

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How to help your partner heal from sexual trauma

How to Help Your Partner Heal from Sexual Trauma

By | Communication, Counseling, Healing, Healing from Sexual Trauma, Molestation, Rape, Sexual abuse, Sexual Trauma, Trauma | No Comments

A few days ago, I wrote about 7 different touching exercises couples can do together to help one or both heal from sexual trauma.  Here are five important things a partner can do to help the sexual trauma victim heal. Get educated.  Read articles and maybe even go to a sexual trauma expert to learn about how sexual trauma affects people. Encourage your partner to see a qualified therapist if he or she is not seeing one already. Be willing…

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I Just Found Out My Partner is Having an Affair

I Just Found Out My Partner is Having an Affair!

By | Communication, Infidelity, Marital Problems, Relationships | No Comments

How Much Do I Need to Know? This is a very important and challenging question for people who are betrayed.  The betrayed spouse is usually blindsided, confused and devastated.  The question- “Who is this person I am supposedly committed to?” is both understandable and painful.   How much detail should the betrayed person know? Most of my clients who have discovered infidelity want to know everything.  There is such a feeling of vulnerability that knowing everything would seemingly be a way…

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Five Keys to Restoring Trust After Infidelity

Five Keys to Restoring Trust After Infidelity

By | Commitment, Communication, Infidelity, Marital Advice, Marriage Advice, Relationships, Sex | No Comments

1)   Get therapy with a reputable expert in infidelity and discover the factors (not excuses) that led to the affair so that alternative healthier solutions can be practiced. 2)   Look for behavioral change  (depending on whatever was discovered as to what was behind the secretive actions) in the relationship that lets you know that something different is truly happening and that there is reason to take a chance on your partner again. 3)   Whenever there is a “risky” situation such as…

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If You Want to Cheat, Just Tell Your Partner First!

If You Want to Cheat, Just Tell Your Partner First!

By | Commitment, Communication, Infidelity, Long Hot Marriage, Marital Problems, Marriage, Relationships, Sex | No Comments

A True Story Let me tell you about a couple who saw me for relationship issues but avoided the more damaging issue of infidelity.  This is their (abridged) story. They had their second child and the kids were less than 2 years apart.  The husband was frustrated with the lack of sex and intimacy.  She was exhausted a lot and the last thing on her mind was having sexual pleasure.  She just needed to get through another day.  They both…

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