surviving marital affairs and intimacy issues

Interview: Overcoming a marital affair and intimacy issues

By | Infidelity, Intimacy, Marriage, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems, Relationships, Romance, Sex | No Comments

I was recently interviewed by The Child Law Help Center about how to build an improved relationship after a marital affair and/or intimacy issues. In it I discuss the two main reasons why couples contact me for help: Lack of intimacy in the relationship Infidelity You'll want to check out the entire article to see what I have to say about the factors leading up to both situations, and my opinion on whether or not I think the relationship can...

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Couple happy after surviving infidelity

Case Study: Keys to Surviving Infidelity Successfully

By | Infidelity, Marital Advice, Marital Problems, Marriage Advice, Marriage Problems | 2 Comments

In this case study I share one of my favorite surviving infidelity success stories. I touch on 2 very important points that are needed to surviving infidelity successfully: 1.  Showing compassion to the injured partner 2.  Uncovering why the infidelity happened. Understanding that the person committing the infidelity isn't a bad person and uncovering the issues behind the infidelity is a major factor and to help prevent affairs from happening again. Both are important factors that help me to have...

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Orgasmic Issues in Women

Orgasmic Issues in Women

By | Arousal, Communication, Eroticism, Female orgasmic disorder, Intimacy, Passion, Sex, Sexual Dysfunction | No Comments

I have worked with many women and couples where the female is having trouble experiencing orgasms.   There are a lot of myths and false information.  As you will see below, physiological, emotional, and relational factors can all contribute to the problem.  However, as we are discovering in many aspects of sexuality, there is no real “normal,” and woman and their partners need to be careful not to be critical of the woman having orgasmic difficulties. Here are ten facts about Female…

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Increasing Female Sexual Arousal and Desire

Increasing Female Sexual Arousal and Desire

By | Arousal, Eroticism, Great Sex, Intimacy, Marriage Advice, Passion, Sensuality, Sex, Sexual Desire, Sexual Dysfunction | No Comments

This month I am writing about women and sexuality.  It is a big and important topic and I will cover one part of it with each blog.  I have seen many women come into my office with or without their partner concerned about their lack of interest regarding sex.  The first thing I want to say about this is that the most recent Diagnostic Manual for those of us in the mental health field has combined female arousal and desire/interest…

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There’s Nothing Stressful Out There

There’s Nothing Stressful Out There!

By | Communication, Compassion, Harmony, Mindfulness, Peace, Spirituality | No Comments

It’s All About Perception Traffic, financial challenges, health fears, obstinate children, meddling in-laws- stressful right? WRONG! There is nothing inherently stressful about any of those challenges.  Yes, it is true these kinds of issues can automatically lead to a fight or flight reaction because on some level, it feels like a threat. However, there is good news here. There is a way to think about every one of those problems in a way that can significantly reduce the stress you…

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De-stress NOW and Enjoy the Holidays

De-stress NOW and Enjoy the Holidays

By | Communication, Harmony, Holidays, Marital Advice, Marital Problems, Meditation, Peace, Spirituality | No Comments

Another client just called me and asked if I could forgive her if she canceled late and not be charged. (I have a 48-hour cancellation policy).  She is plowed under with a lot of Christmas cards to get out.  I felt like being generous so I let her off the hook.  She released a sigh of relief.   This is a common scenario and many of you reading this can relate.  My wife and I went to REI because I…

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Meditation, Marriage and other miscellaneous matters

Meditation, Marriage and other Miscellaneous Matters

By | Communication, Harmony, Healthy Marriage, Marriage, Meditation | No Comments

The Benefits of Developing a meditation practice Wednesday night is my Yoga/Meditation class night.  Wednesday nights I notice how I handle interpersonal issues with my wife so much more lovingly.  I handle my emotions more effectively and it takes so much more to get me stressed.   I remember a few classes where I was angry with my wife over some matter in the beginning of class and I saw her and our situation totally differently at the end of class….

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How To Stop Your Family From Pulling Your Chains

By | Dysfunctional Family, Family Relationships, Holidays | No Comments

How to not let family members or anyone for that matter pull your chains Your family doesn’t have to yank your chains during the holidays or anytime you get together for that matter.   Watch this short video where Todd shows you how to keep those happy feelings even when someone says something that pushes your buttons. Here’s to keeping your family celebrations happy!    

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Diffuse Conflict Quickly

Diffuse Conflict Quickly

By | Commitment, Conflict Resolution, Family Relationships, Harmony, Intimacy, Long Hot Marriage, Love, Marital Advice, Marriage Advice, Peace, Relationships | No Comments

A Powerful Tool to Go From Conflict to Peace I want to discuss with you one of the most powerful tools I know that can de-escalate conflict.  This tool can be used with your intimate partner as well as in any relationship.  It is particularly useful at this time of the year when underlying conflicts seem to come to the surface.  (I am already seeing it in the phone calls I am getting since last week and continuing this week)….

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The Link Between Gratitude and Your Sex Life

The Link Between Gratitude and Your Sex Life

By | Creating More Passion in Marriage, Eroticism, Gratitude, Great Sex, Long Hot Marriage, Marital Advice, Passion, Relationships, Sensuality, Thanksgiving | No Comments

What you focus on may determine the quality of your sex life. I want to talk about this from 3 angles: 1) How gratitude affects your sense of psychological well being, 2) How gratitude affects the wellbeing of your partner and 3) how gratitude affects your brain. Then I can do the easy job of linking all that to your sex life. It has been clearly established in the field of mental health that what we think affects how we…

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