From Getting Divorced to Madly In Love

From Getting Divorced to Madly In Love: How This Couple Did It

By | Commitment, Divorce, Successful Marriages | No Comments

“There is a 90% chance that I will file for divorce.”   That is what Anna (I changed the name for confidentiality reasons) said when her husband was a few minutes late to their couples appointment.  Then she continued, “It has to be his way or the highway. I don’t feel like I have a voice in this marriage.” She was looking for apartments to move out unbeknownst to him at the time.  This was our second session together. I…

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Why people divorce

The real reasons why people divorce

By | Divorce | One Comment

I was at the gym the other day and my accountant friend asked me if the biggest reason why people divorce is due to money. Of course, that is the world my accountant friend lives in.  I do not know if that means that a substance abuse counselor might think divorce is due mostly to drugs and that a tantric sex educator would think divorce is due mainly to sex. I do hear that a lot though- people say that…

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How to recover from infidelity

How to recover from infidelity

By | Cheating, Infidelity | No Comments

When I meet with couples (or individuals) who are needing help to recover from infidelity there are 2 questions I get asked all the time… How will I ever get over infidelity? And how long will it take me recover? Watch this video I created for you about how to recover from infidelity and thrive again as a couple. What does thriving after infidelity look like?  I cover this in-depth in the video. The number one piece of advice I…

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Infidelity- When Is It Time To Move On?

Infidelity- When Is It Time To Move On?

By | Communication, Divorce, Infidelity | No Comments

5 Scenarios that May Tip the Scale Towards Saying Goodbye Last week, I wrote an article about when it makes sense for the betrayed partner to stay engaged in the relationship after infidelity.   Most of the couples that see me end up not only together but having a deeper and more connected relationship than before the affair. As I have said many times, this is not to say that cheating is a good thing; it is not.  However, with…

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Infidelity- When Does It Make Sense to Stay

Infidelity- When Does It Make Sense to Stay? The Necessary Seven Conditions

By | Commitment, Communication, Healing, Infidelity, Intimacy, Love advice, Marital Problems, Marriage Advice | One Comment

We are hearing about it all the time in the media- politicians, celebrities- infidelity is rampant and is as painful as it is rampant.   Maybe you have experienced it either as one who was betrayed or the one who betrayed. I have many couples each week that I work with on this painful problem and most of the time there is ambivalence on the part of the betrayed partner.  Should I stay or should I go?  This article is discussing…

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How to overcome your dysfunctional family

Break Free and Overcome Your Dysfunctional Family

By | Dysfunctional Family, Family Problems, Family Relationships, family Roles, Family Therapy | No Comments

The ability to break free and overcome our dysfunctional families is within your power. Watch this short video I created for where I give you hope that it is possible to break free from the chains that are holding you back from being your authentic self.    If you took over the role of care-taking as a child or find yourself choosing partners as an adult who need to be taken care of you'll want to watch this video.  ...

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Dysfunctional Families and Reverse Parenting

Dysfunctional Families and Reverse Parenting

By | Dysfunctional Family, Family Problems, Family Relationships | No Comments

Dysfunctional Families and Reverse Parenting When the Child Becomes the Caretaker In some families, one or both parents are too stressed, immature or ill to be the calming and effective parents that the children truly need.    In order to feel secure, children need to experience their parents as big people so that they can be freed up to be the small people they really are.  But not all children are fortunate to have this deserved experience. Some find themselves...

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Bring the Best Out of Others

Relationship Mastery: Bring the Best Out of Others

By | Family Relationships, Relationships | No Comments

You are a powerful interpersonal center of influence.   It only takes ONE in a relationship to bring the best out of others.  It doesn’t matter if this is a personal or a more casual relationship.  You have the power. In other words, you have the ability to affect others in both negative and positive ways.  You are not a neutral force; it is impossible to be neutral.  Think of a time when you were at a social event and there…

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Staying connected to your partner

Relationship Mastery: Staying Connected with Your Partner

By | Communication, Marriage Advice, Relationships, Successful Marriages | No Comments

I've recorded a new video for the Relationship Mastery series and it's got great tips on staying connected with your partner. I've been working with couples for 30+ years and I see that they all have one thing in common...An amazing capacity for passionate and nurturing relationships. In this video I discuss the one thing that holds us back from having that relationship with our partner. And I share what successful couples do to have more passion, romance and laughter...

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Relationship Mastery- Increasing Self-Love

Relationship Mastery: Increasing Self-Love

By | Communication, Intimacy, Long Hot Marriage, Love, Marriage Advice, Relationships, Sex | No Comments

Love is circulation.  The more we give it, the more we receive it; the more we receive it, the more we give it.   Co-dependency is not love because co-dependency is giving to others with the habit of sacrificing yourself.  This giving cannot be sustained because the co-dependent person burns out, grows in resentment and ultimately can hate.  This happens because the codependent person is closed off to self-love. Self-love requires accessing your needs and wants; your true self- the…

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